Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Tuesdays with Charlie- Embracing the Crazy


Today's pictures are from Thursday, which was Charlie's last day of school.  I think he had a great time this month, and I'm glad we tried it when we did, but I'm also glad we decided to end it now.  I just never felt settled about it and it wasn't quite working out for us the way we thought it would.


He's only two, so I knew he didn't need to be in school yet.  But I was hoping it would be a good time for him to play with some other kids, maybe learn a few things, and mostly to give me a nice break and some time to spend with Norah one on one.  But the problem was, we were just too busy!  Because not only did he have school on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but I go to a bible study on Mondays, MOPs on Fridays, and church on Sundays and Wednesday nights.  Plus I have a gym membership.  So my two year old, who I stay home with, was in childcare every single day except Saturday for at least two hours, usually more.  Now this would be fine if I had, say, a job or something that I needed to do.  But I don't.  I am a stay at home mom.  But I was not staying home.


For some people, their two year old needs more socializing time, time away from mom, and just a reason to get out of the house.  But not this two year old, and not this mom.  It just wasn't working out.  So now we are back to our old routine.  And it just feels right.  There will be crazy times when I wonder if I made the right decision... for example, this morning when after the gym I decided to run a few quick errands with both kids and ended up with breast milk all down my shirt, and two crazy-whiny-cranky kids. 



But then there are other moments- like when buckling Charlie into his seat, he (for the first time!) completely unprompted said "I love you mommy," and I whispered a prayer of thanks and then a request for energy and patience with these two so that I can enjoy this crazy season of life.  Because the next crazy season of everyday busy-ness and making lunches and running off to school will come for us too.  Its just not here yet.  So for now my goal every day is to embrace this life, even when I am so tired I'm not sure I can keep going, even where there are mishaps, time-outs, boo-boos, spit-up, etc.


I'm embracing the crazy.
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9 comments:

Dacia said...

i felt like i was reading my own thoughts reading this post. we went through the same thing with preschool about the same age and because i wanted alone time with clara. but i too had mops and bible study, etc...and started to feel the same as you. plus, it was affecting clara's schedule with me driving ellie to preschool 2 days a week for just 2 hours. she rarely got a good nap. i'm glad you have a peace about your decision! i still sometimes wonder if ellie misses preschool...she loved it SOOO much!

Bethany said...

Yes, Dacia that was the other part of it that I didn't even post about- the drop off and pick up times were right during Norah's naptimes! Which made her fussy basically the whole day. Not fun. Today ended up being great and they both took a good nap. :) Charlie really enjoyed it too, but I know he gets his socializing in other ways and at least you know she will love school when you really feel like its time!
Thanks for your comment. :)

Joni said...

You and Paul are both such amazing parents, Bethany, and I'm so proud of you! (you also have beautiful children, and i can't wait to see you all!)

Teri Dufilho said...

bethany, i understand all of your feelings, and i'm just thanking God in my heart right now for the awesome, wise parents that ya'll are!.....charlie and norah are so blessed!!.....those pictures of charlie are too cute!...... love the term "embracing the crazy"!

Megan Lagoy said...

So proud of you Bethany. You are such a good momma and I'm so glad you have the wisdom to embrace the crazy...while still praying for God's help! Some moments are hard but it does go by so fast and it's all so wonderful!

Just Us said...

Ya for you Bethany. You are such a great mommy. Having no kids - I have no clue what a hard decison this must have been but it definetly seems like you made the right choice. I hope you totally enjoy - what will now seem like - the extra time you get with sweet Charlie. I bet your heart just melted when he said - i love you-

Bush Family said...

I love reading your blog but it really makes me miss ya'll! But hey, only 3 months until OKC 10/11!

susan said...

You are so wise, Bethany! It does go so quickly and you will never regret spending more time with your kids! They will have plenty of opportunities to socialize and go to school.... I think you made a great decision.

Kerri said...

Bethany, what a sweet writer. I love how you spoke for yourself and not all moms everywhere in this post. What a lovely woman, and yes great mom!